The Weird Jobs Celebrities Had Before They Were Famous

Everyone goes to Hollywood with the hopes of becoming an actor or a model or a musician (well, it seems like they do) and they tend to wait tables and mix drinks before they get into the business. It’s the Hollywood story, right? I waited tables until I was discovered and now I’m a super famous model or actress (not me, I mean). It’s common; but it’s not all that interesting. What is interesting, however, is the fact that so many of the people in Hollywood who are some of the most famous people on the planet today had some seriously weird jobs before they were famous. Even people like Madonna were not always Madonna; they were just regular people looking for a way to make ends meet and sometimes they had to do some really, really weird things to make that possible. Read on to find out which celebs had the weirdest pre-celebrity status jobs.

Brad Pitt – Limo Driver and Stripper Assistant

He probably would have made a good stripper, but he just drove the limo for them. That’s right; he wasn’t your every day driver for proms and weddings and nights on the town. Pitt drove limos around filled with strippers to get them to parties. Part of the job description was to play the cheesy  music that they dance to, collect the payment from the inebriated bride or groom-to-be and catch the clothes that the strippers threw off in the middle of their routines.

Hugh Jackman – Clown

Before he was the wolverine and starring in hit musicals, he was a clown. That’s right. The man we all dream of in a way that’s probably not appropriate was a man most of us would actually call a nightmare. Who even thinks clowns are funny or amusing, and who on earth thought these things were a good idea for children’s parties? Though it’s probably safe to assume that we’d all welcome Hugh Jackman the clown into our homes.

Whoopie Goldberg – Phone Sex Operator

Most of us love and adore Whoopie. She’s funny and opinionated and intelligent and her roles keep us laughing. But we don’t really see her as much of a sex symbol. It’s just not in her personality. However, before she was being nominated for awards and hosting hit talk shows, she was a phone sex operator. Hey, you gotta do what you gotta do to make ends meet when you’re waiting for your big break, right? The money was great, but she says it’s not a career she can go back to since people would probably recognize her voice.

Christopher Walken – Lion Tamer

It’s not weird; it’s cool. Before he was a world famous actor, he was a lion tamer. There aren’t that many people in the world who can say that they once had a job like this, but he can. Actually, his former job is much cooler than his current job. Sure, being an actor is awesome, but being a lion tamer is awesome.

Matthew  McConaughey – Chicken Coop Cleaner

There are dirty jobs and then there are dirty jobs. Matthew McConaughey had the latter. He had to clean chicken coops for a living, which I was unaware was even a real job. I thought people who owned chickens did this themselves, which is just one of the 299 reasons I do not own chickens. He was living in Australia at the time as an exchange student and this was the job he boasted. He was also a dishwasher, but that’s a pretty typical pre-fame job.

Rod Stewart – Gravedigger

Before he was a famous singer making us all swoon, he was digging graves and putting bodies into the ground. Believe it or not, it wasn’t his first choice as a job. But he did feel that he had an irrational fear of dying, so he worked hard to get this job so that he could overcome his fears. Talk about facing your fears and overcoming them in the most obvious manner.

Megan Fox – Banana

Before she was famous and gorgeous and all that good stuff, she used to dress up as a giant banana and stand outside a smoothie shop in Florida. Her job was to bring in the customers. It’s just our opinion – as non-smoothie shop owners – that her job might have been more successful if she were just dressed as herself. She’s a lot better looking than a banana, after all.

Orlando Bloom – Clay Trapper

Have you ever seen those people that love to shoot clay in the air and call it a day? Have you ever wondered who loads that clay into discs and aims them so that shooters have a target? Well, you probably didn’t wonder that – ever – but you’re thinking about it now, aren’t you? Orlando Bloom used to load and aim those discs for a living. I have no idea how much money those people are paid, but it’s probably a safe assumption he’s a little better off right now.

Jon Hamm – Adult Film Set Dresser

Most people only watch porn for the entertainment value – especially those awesome sets in the background, right? Right. Anyway, Jon Hamm, before he was a famous heartthrob, was a set dresser in the adult entertainment industry. It might actually be one of the most interest job titles around. We bet he didn’t enjoy it as much as you might think, however. I bet those sets got a little…messy.

Patrick Dempsey – Professional Juggler

It’s really difficult to discuss McDreamy without tearing up and reliving his untimely death on “Grey’s” earlier this year. We’re still sore and very bitter about that one. I haven’t watched anymore of the episodes following his death, and I will not. However, before he was McDreamy, he was a professional juggler. I don’t know if it’s weird to have such a cool talent, but it’s pretty weird someone with such a pretty face would even need a job like that. He should have just been a pretty face. I’d pay him for it.

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